Tuesday, 4 January 2011

Platforms and Planks

Tuesday 4th January 2011, A. Palmer


I’m on the edge here.
Looking over releases that rush,
where the buzz of my own mortality
tickles my demons, their tongues
licking viciously around the word.

In that second,
we expect everything to become clear,
to see true desire arrive at the eleventh hour
and save the day like some anti-hero.

But it doesn’t.
It just evaporates into a hot back,
and a mind stuck on pause, blank,
stuttering like producers of live TV in a hairy moment.

Thankfully, I’m gripped by fear.
It holds me back like a loving one.
Don’t do it, the nausea pleads.

So I don’t. I’m sick instead.
The hero leaves my body like
a knight riding off into a sequel-
a white one with orange bits in.

9 comments:

  1. wow.i have stood there...and you capture it well...

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  2. I've read this three times, Arron, and each time I like it even more. Well done, sir.

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  3. Extremely well crafted under the casual and ready flow--man, just a great piece. .."Thankfully, I'm gripped by fear..." Excellent poem of choice and consequence, expectations and reality.

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  4. I like the idea of being saved by not acting like a hero.

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  5. excellent write arron - i like the orange bits - and i like how tight you put the struggle into words..

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  6. Thank you for all the kind comments. Personally, I'm not a fan of this one. This is about a recurring dream (or nightmare, as some may prefer) where I found myself on the edge of tall platforms. I don't have a fear of heights, but I do 'suffer' from a strange urge to jump whenever I am at a cliff edge. Not in a depressing, suicidal way, more out the recognition that I am, in that particular moment, solely responsible for the sustainability of my life. It is the sudden, andvery real, realisation of my own mortality that gives me such a rush. I can't quite explain it, it's almost like I want to jump, not because I really want to, but because I can, and doing so would yield me the greatest power over myself. Weird I know, but the buzz of it and sheer scale of the notion always leaves me nauseous, which eventually 'saves' me as I have to step away. It's almost like a vertigo, hence the "orange bits" in the 'White Knight' that Tess and Claudia liked.

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  7. Solid bringing-together of disparate images/ideas, into a cohesive whole. Good work!

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